Updated Oct 29, 2025 • ~9 min read
Morning came too soon.
Jane woke to Clara crying through the phone—FaceTime from the babysitter. Her daughter needed her. Wanted her mama.
Gabriel drove them back to the farmhouse in silence. Not uncomfortable silence. Just—heavy. Weighted with everything unsaid from last night.
Jane held Clara the entire drive. Breathed in that baby smell. Let her daughter’s presence ground her.
At the house, the babysitter left. Just the three of them now.
Gabriel made breakfast. Jane fed Clara. They moved around each other like dancers who knew the choreography but had forgotten the music.
“I should probably head back to the inn,” Gabriel said after he’d cleaned up. “Give you some space.”
“The inn in Seabrook Bay?”
“Yeah. Project’s wrapping up, but I should check in. Make sure everything’s on track.” He wasn’t looking at her. “I’ll be back in a few days. Unless you need me sooner.”
“Gabriel—”
“It’s fine, Jane. Really.” He grabbed his jacket. “I’ll call later. Check on Clara.”
“Wait.” Jane set Clara in her bouncer. Followed Gabriel to the door. “We need to talk about last night.”
“We don’t, actually.” Gabriel’s voice was careful. Controlled. “You made yourself clear. You can’t do this. I respect that.”
“But I—” Jane struggled for words. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“You’re not losing me. I’m just giving you space.” He finally looked at her. “You need time to process everything. The arrest, the gala, your feelings. I get it.”
“Do you? Because it seems like you’re running away.”
Gabriel’s jaw tightened. “I’m not running. I’m respecting your boundaries. You said you can’t do this. So I’m—” He stopped. “I’m not going to stand here and make you feel guilty for not being ready. That’s not fair to either of us.”
“I never said I wasn’t ready—”
“You said you can’t love me because everyone you love destroys you. That’s pretty clear communication.” Gabriel’s voice was steady but Jane could hear the hurt underneath. “And I understand. I do. But I also can’t—” He swallowed hard. “I can’t stand here and pretend it doesn’t hurt. So I need some distance. Just for a few days.”
Jane felt panic rising. “You’re leaving because I’m broken.”
“No. I’m leaving because you need space and I need to breathe.” Gabriel touched her face gently. “This isn’t me giving up. It’s me respecting what you asked for.”
Jane stepped back from his touch. “That’s bullshit. You’re leaving because I’m too damaged. Too much work. Too—”
“Stop.” Gabriel’s voice was sharp. “Don’t put words in my mouth. Don’t make this about you being broken when it’s about you needing time.”
“Same thing.”
“It’s really not.” He picked up his bag. “I love you. That hasn’t changed. But I can’t force you to trust me. Can’t make you believe I won’t hurt you. You have to get there yourself.”
“And if I never do?”
Gabriel was quiet for a long moment. “Then I’ll deal with that when it happens. But I’m not making that decision for you.”
He moved toward the door. Jane felt something desperate claw up her throat.
“You know what?” Her voice came out harsh. Mean. “Maybe it’s better this way. Maybe you should go back to Connecticut. Back to your real life. Find someone who isn’t a mess. Someone who can actually give you what you want.”
Gabriel stopped. Turned slowly. “What are you doing?”
“Telling you the truth. You deserve better than this. Better than me.” Jane forced the words out, each one cutting her throat. “You deserve someone who can love you without being terrified. Someone whole. Someone who doesn’t have a psychotic ex-husband and a baby and enough trauma to fill a psychology textbook.”
“Jane—”
“I mean it. You should leave. Go find someone normal. Someone easy.” She crossed her arms. Defensive. Destroying. “Because I’m never going to be easy. I’m always going to be scared. Always going to push you away when you get too close. And you—” Her voice cracked. “You deserve better than that.”
Gabriel stared at her. Really stared. Like he was reading every word she wasn’t saying.
“You’re trying to push me away,” he said quietly. “Saying cruel things so I’ll leave before you have to risk trusting me.”
“I’m being honest—”
“You’re being scared.” Gabriel set down his bag. Stepped closer. “And I see through it. I see what you’re doing. Trying to make me leave so you don’t have to feel guilty about not being ready.”
Jane’s eyes burned. “Just go. Please. Make this easier and just go.”
“No.”
“Gabriel—”
“I said no.” His voice was firm. “I’m not leaving because you said some things you don’t mean. I’m not going to let you sabotage this because you’re scared.”
“I’m not sabotaging—”
“Yes, you are. And I understand why. David spent years making you doubt yourself, making you think you weren’t enough. And now you’re doing it to yourself.” Gabriel’s eyes were intense. “But I’m not him. And I’m not going anywhere just because you told me to.”
Jane felt tears spilling over. “I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to let you in without breaking.”
“Then don’t let me all the way in. Let me in a little at a time. At whatever pace you can handle.” Gabriel reached out slowly, took her hands. “I’m not asking for everything. Just—don’t push me away completely. Don’t try to make me leave because you’re scared.”
“What if I hurt you?” Jane whispered. “What if I can’t ever trust you the way you deserve? What if—”
“Then we deal with it together. But you don’t get to make that decision for me.” Gabriel squeezed her hands gently. “I know what I’m signing up for. I know you’re scared. I know this is hard. But I’m choosing this. Choosing you. Choosing Clara. All of it.”
Jane’s defenses were crumbling. “Why? Why would you choose this?”
“Because I love you. And love isn’t about easy. It’s about worth it. And you—” His voice roughened. “You’re worth every difficult moment.”
Jane pulled her hands back. Wrapped her arms around herself. “I need you to go.”
Gabriel’s expression fell. “Jane—”
“Not forever. Just—for a few days. Like you said. I need space. I need time to—” She couldn’t finish. Couldn’t explain that she needed to figure out how to stop destroying good things before they started.
Gabriel studied her face. Then nodded slowly. “Okay. A few days. But Jane—” He waited until she met his eyes. “I’m coming back. Whether you want me to or not. Because Clara needs me. And you—” He stopped. “You need me too, even if you can’t admit it yet.”
He picked up his bag. Walked to the door.
Paused with his hand on the knob.
“I love you,” he said without turning around. “And nothing you say is going to change that. So stop trying.”
Then he left.
Jane stood in the empty farmhouse, Clara babbling happily in her bouncer, and felt like she’d just made the biggest mistake of her life.
She’d pushed him away. Told him to leave. Said cruel things designed to hurt him.
And he’d seen right through it.
Had called her out. Had refused to leave on those terms.
But had still given her the space she’d asked for.
Jane sank onto the couch. Put her face in her hands.
“I’m an idiot,” she said out loud.
Clara made a sound. Agreement, maybe.
Jane picked up her daughter. Held her close. “Your uncle loves us. And I just pushed him away because I’m too scared to be happy.”
Clara grabbed Jane’s hair. Pulled.
“Ow. Yeah, I deserve that.” Jane gently untangled tiny fingers. “What do I do, baby girl? How do I stop being so scared?”
Clara yawned. Unimpressed with her mother’s emotional crisis.
Jane spent the rest of the day in a fog. Fed Clara. Changed diapers. Went through the motions.
But her mind was elsewhere. Replaying the morning. The things she’d said. The hurt in Gabriel’s eyes.
You deserve someone who isn’t a mess.
You should find someone normal.
Maybe it’s better this way.
All lies. Cruel lies designed to make him leave before she had to risk everything.
And he’d seen through every single one.
That night, after Clara was asleep, Jane stood on the porch looking out at the dark woods.
Her phone buzzed. A text from Gabriel.
Made it back to Seabrook Bay. Clara sleeping okay?
Jane’s throat tightened. Even after everything, he was checking on them.
She’s fine. Went down easy.
Three dots appeared. Disappeared. Appeared again.
Good. Call if you need anything.
Jane stared at the message. Wanted to type: I need you. I need you to come back. I need to stop being so scared.
Instead she typed: Thank you.
Anytime.
Jane lowered the phone. Looked up at the stars.
“I love him,” she whispered to the night. “And I just pushed him away.”
The stars didn’t answer. Just glittered coldly in the dark.
Jane went inside. Lay in bed. Stared at the ceiling.
And realized: she was more scared of losing Gabriel than she was of trusting him.
Which meant she had to fix this.
Had to stop running from the best thing that had ever happened to her.
Had to be brave enough to let him in, even though it terrified her.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow she’d figure out how.
But tonight, she let herself feel the regret. The loss. The emptiness of pushing away someone who loved her.
It felt like dying.
And Jane had already died once. She didn’t want to do it again.
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